writing a book vs. writing a Facebook

I'm mystified as to why so many authors, presumably good at writing, leave it up to others to come up with their social media profiles. Here's how David Sedaris, one of the most gifted, funniest writers on the planet, greets visitors to his Facebook page:

This page is updated by David's management and publisher to keep fans informed about new events, articles, and to allow fans to share feedback and connect with other David Sedaris readers. David knows and hears about this page but does not create posts.

I know better, I think, merrily setting up my first-ever Facebook author page, hoping it's warm and inviting and a fun place to hang out. But do I really know best? Sedaris has 575,000 "Likes" to my measly 20. Hoping you'll help narrow the gap after the jump.

you knew it was coming⎯product placement in Farmville

Next week, for the first time, you can plant a real crop on your pretend farm. According to the NYTimes, Cascadian Farm, a subsidiary of General Mills, is offering Farmville players a branded blueberry crop that can be "harvested faster" and "bring a bigger cash return." Marketers are hoping to incent real-world buying of Cascadian Farm's 75 organic products by seeding awareness of the brand in FarmVille’s audience: of 20 million who farm daily, 60% are female, 20-40 yrs. old.

It's the company's first venture into social media. More evidence of ad dollars trending social: before this campaign, the company relied mainly on promoting via print ads in lifestyle magazines like Real Simple and sampling at community events like 5K races.

Cascadian isn't the first General Mills brand to partner with Zynga, growers of Farmvillle. In May, Green Giant Fresh subsidiary placed a coded sticker on broccoli, celery and other fresh (really?) products sold at 4,000 Target stores across the country. Each sticker was redeemable at TheGiant.com for five free “farm cash” units, the currency players use for FarmVille projects. In five weeks, $100,000 worth of the units were redeemed online by customers, who cashed in an average of two coupons each.

The Cascadian Farm promo is scheduled to run for only a week. Future direction will be determined after assessing FarmVille results, which will be measured by not only Web activity like hits to its blog but by call-ins to a real-world 800 number.

My guess is, faux farmers will soon be greening their acres with Deere tractors, Sears harvesters and Monsanto weed wranglers as Farmville enters its Second Life.

a lady's guide to facebook etiquette

More and more friends are migrating off Facebook. "I'm tired of being contacted by people I didn't like years ago. Why would I like them now?" one told me before closing down the account she'd had for a couple of years. Another bailed after receiving a friend request from the first person she'd fired, back in the 80s.

I'm more of a Twitter person, myself. Because I think of Facebook as the place for meeting people you used to know; Twitter for meeting those you want to know now.

But in my role as social media evangelist, I talk to plenty of FB newbies. Over 45 million signed up for Facebook in January alone. Where teenagers now make up no more than 12% of the population. In fact, the fastest growing FB demographic is women over 55. Which may be why this dandy Etiquette Guide is styled to look like a 1950s-era instructional film. (Props to YourTango.)

social media is like sex

I was trying to explain social media to a friend in advertising the other day. She's one of the smartest art directors I know, who can ferret out meaning from the most obtusely written brief.

"I don't get social media," she said. "What the heck is it, anyway?"

I told my friend not to feel bad. Lots people still don't get social media. Even those who claim that they do. I quoted something making the rounds on twitter recently: Social media is like teen sex. Everyone says they're getting it, but few really do. (An adaptation of another tweet from a Google analytics guru.)

As I began describing Twitter streams and Facebook widgets and analytics and vlogs, her eyes glazed over. And I realized another reason social media is like sex. You can talk all you want about the mechanics to people. But until they do it, they can't know what all the fuss is about.

Last week Joseph Jaffee wrote a piece on social media for Adweek. Many commenters accused him of being condescending to ad agency types by writing a primer too basic for them. Some of the comments were personally insulting and Alan Wolk referred to this backlash in an article on a new era of meanspiritedness on Madison Avenue. Surely, for negative commenters, the piece was too basic. But I think those of us immersed in SM often overestimate the degree of conversance normal people have with it.

Ad agency revenue models are still tied to client spending on media. And social media is still perceived to be free. (Fred Wilson called it "earned" media, but isn't that PR? How about the more robust CGM--Consumer Generated Media.) Not surprising if creatives at global AORs are still encouraged to think of social media as just one more shiny charm to add to their campaign bracelet.

youtube, youtell

I just heard that an acquaintance is breaking up with her husband, courtesy of Facebook which showcased her new "relationship status " with a broken-heart icon, just in case I was too dense to read.

Facebook, you stalker, gossipmonger, snoop, intruder, dispenser of unasked for personal details, too much information, more than I need to know about anyone. I do not care that X and Y are now friends. Or that Z added new photos. Or that G is attending a party I wasn't invited to and that S is no longer interested in Shopping.

I don't care, but I know companies do. Which is why YouTube is introducing a new service that gives uploaders free statistics, charts and maps about people who watch their videos. It's a lot like Facebook's weekly Insights reports-- in fact, Youtube didn't even bother to come up with a new name. Their new service is Insight. So next time you watch a Youtube video, know that your age, gender and geographic location are being transmitted to the video's uploader.

Which is probably why Facebook now greets me, age first.

Hello, XX Year Old Female. Enter your zip to get free samples of your favorite products!

And they're not talking tampons. Come to me, Botox Cream, Fibercil, Cellulite-Busters.

twitter bully still at large-UPDATE

Blogger Ariel Waldman has been harassed on Twitter by a cyberbully since June 2007, but Twitter refuses to do anything about it because:

Unfortunately, although [this user’s] behavior is admittedly mean, [s/he] isn’t...doing anything illegal.

UPDATE- Read latest Twitter responses and AW's take on situation in new post.

Too bad Waldman isn't a parent of a middle schooler in New York City where she'd apparently wield more cyber clout. Middle school students at several schools across the city were dismayed this week when their Facebook accounts were unexpectedly closed, in conjunction with the shut-down by "an unknown force" of a pseudo-Gossip Girl site started by an anonymous 8th grader calling herself Miss ITK (Miss In The Know). The blog catalogued the class of 2012 into A lists and B lists causing consternation and tears among 8th grade girls--and their parents. (Cache of a blog page still here, as of posting.)

A spokeswoman for Facebook, Malorie Lucich, said accounts are disabled if terms of service are in violation.

See, Twitter? For the sake of abiding members, other providers take TOS seriously.

facebook, myob!

So, I have to admit, I am new to the whole facebook thing. ("How did you meet friends without facebook when you were in college?" my kids wonder.) I think of facebook as an electronic version of the obnoxious nosy neighbor sniffing out everything about you you'd rather keep private: who you talk to, who you email, IM, chat with, twitter, what you are buying (or even thinking of buying) online. For this reason, I am insulted to log on today (for the first time in weeks) and see an ad (just for me?):

Cure dandruff naturally.
The reduce dandruff brush discreetly kills 88 percent of the fungus that causes dandruff. Made from copper, a natural fungicide.

Um, shouldn't there be a hyphen between reduce and dandruff? But I suppose punctuation is too old school for new media.

people who work in an advertising agency and feel just like a prostitute

A while back, Jane Sample posted about this facebook group, but given that the world's oldest profession is so much in the news, I thought you'd enjoy a reminder of how our own work, um, measures up to it. Here's the facebook description in all of its goodness, a list I wish I had written myself:

The truth about working in an ad agency
1. You work weird (night) shifts...
Just like prostitutes.

2. They pay you to make the client happy...
Just like a prostitute.

3. The client pays a lot of money, but your employer keeps almost
every penny...
Just like a prostitute.

4. You are rewarded for fulfilling the client's dreams...
Just like a prostitute.

5. Your friendships fall apart and you end up hanging out with
people in the same profession as you...
Just like a prostitute.

6. When you have to meet the client you always have to be perfectly
groomed...
Just like a prostitute.

7. But when you go back home it seems like you are coming back from
hell...
Just like a prostitute.

8. The client always wants to pay less but expects incredible things
from you...
Just like a prostitute.

9. When people ask you about your job, you have difficulties to explain it...
Just like a prostitute.

10. Everyday when you wake up, you say: "I'm not going to spend the rest of my life doing this."

JUST LIKE A PROSTITUTE!!!