Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Swedish soldiers want penis back


Nordic military men are in a huff because the lion on their coat of arms was castrated. The emasculation was first said to be the result of pressure by female soldiers, but this rumor proved false. Turns out the Commander in Chief of the Nordic Battlegroup himself gave the lion the snip because, proving that even military men can be sensitive types, he doesn't consider the male appendage an appropriate symbol for his troops to wear into battle--too many civilian women sexually abused in war zones. A military artist was dismayed by what he called the Commander's lack of historical awareness. In former times, the artist said, lions without genitalia were used on coats of arms reserved for traitors. If size of the lion's member was an issue, he explained, “we could have made the dimensions a bit smaller. Once we created a similar symbol for another client-Swedish Customs and [when they objected] we just shrank the organ.” (Thanks, DKR, for the link.)

Speaking of miniature male genitalia, a friend alerts me to a product that’s all the rage in LA: a plug for the L’il Fountain to keep parents of Valley Boys dry during diaper changes.

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